jokes

1.
A man got 2 wishes from GOD. He asked for the Best wine and Best Woman.
    Next moment, he had the Best Wine and Mother Teresa next to him.
    Moral : BE SPECIFIC
2.
Question : When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their MISTAKE.
    Answer : On their MARRIAGE.
3.
Big B Says: Mere Pass Divali ke liye Tikali hai, fulzadi hai, anar hai, Lawangia fataka hai, Roket hai, chakri hain, sutali bomb hai.

Tumhare pass kya hai? aayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

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Shashi says:
Mere paas

Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaChis

hai .
2.
Mr Bean went to sleep....... ...
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What did he become ??
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Soya Bean :-) !!!!
4.
What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?
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Dam!
5.
What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long?
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Polaroid's

Silly quiz

Question: Which world famous person's last name can be spelled with just three consecutive letters of English alphabet?

Hint: Think outside the box. It would be easier to answer this question if you knew that smiles is the longest word in the English language since there is a mile between the first and the last letter!

Want to know what is common between the success of Harry Potter and a software engineer? Here is the answer.

Go Green

trashtrashtrashtrashtrashtrashtrashtrash

You can take Rashtra out of trash. Or you can take trash out of a Rashtra. Either way, we all win. Go Green.

Tip #1:
Do not use paper cups. Either at work or home. Use a glass bottle, use a porcelain mug, use a steel tumbler. But never a paper cup.



















Tip #2. Of course, pens are not just dime a dozen but free at your favorite stationery room at work. Be considerate and do not use another pen until you are done with the current one. Guard it with same love you would give to your iPod.

Tip #3. Ditto for the notepad. Do not grab another one until you have used up all the pages from the current one.

Tip #4. Turn off all energy consuming accessories at your desk when you call it a day. These include desktop fans, water fountains, lamps, cellphone chargers, monitors, etc.

Tip #5. Get into habit of writing small notes on your hand held device. It saves paper. And you are less prone to lose it. Better yet, email that note to yourself. Now it will stay forever and moreover searchable. What was the phone number of handyman that Janet highly recommended?

Tip #6. Do not print directions to places which are close to familiar places. Just jot down last few turns. You know how to get to higway from your place. All you need to know is which exit to take and what do after that. It is usually less than 5 steps.

Do you have more tips? Please add them to the comments. Or if you are shy, send me an email: upadhyaya@yahoo.com

Carpool - Are we really committed to it?

Carpool, vanpool, bus passes.

These are all the programs that many companies promote and encourage their employees to use to ease the traffic and be environment friendly.

However, the real test comes when you notice that not many of the leadership team use these same options.

One would like to think that the leadership team do not find these options useful since they are working long hours.

I would like to believe that none of them actually ever used these options at any point of time in their life. And that is one of the reasons why they rose through the ranks.

So the message is clear.